A man should never constrain his fantasies. Some of mine involve utilizing the power of the state in order to achieve much-needed attitude adjustments in other people. For instance, I’ve used this publication to advocate the banning of craft beer in conjunction with gun confiscation to cure my masculine MAGA-tier friends of their delusions about living as free Americans. Only in their abject humiliation will they seek true liberty.
Indeed, if recent history has taught us anything it’s that coercion can move mountains while plainly observable truths fail to shift mole hills. While this is a problem for a cattleman, the implications are much greater for a country. Yet, there is hope because coercion can be helpfully applied towards all elements of society. The only question is the application itself: punishments must be tailored to people.
The class I’m referring to this time are not the delusional MAGA-tier friends among whom I lurk. Rather, these are the pathetic men who fill me with disgust: noodle-armed soy addicts, the kind who do glory-hole faces in photographs. Perhaps they sport a tattoo from a comic book, you know the type. For a man with dignity, being stripped of it is punishment enough. But what about these nu-males?
Perhaps some inspiration can be derived from the “Wisdom of the Orient.” Back in the 20th century, there was a guy named Chairman Mao Tse-Tung. He had a serious problem. He’d unleashed hordes (that’s millions in Chinese terms) of educated urban youths on the nation in a chaotic effort to purge his political opposition. This became known as the “Cultural Revolution.” But, after it was supposed to be over, he couldn’t get these young people to behave themselves again.
Mao had the insight to understand that the core of the problem was their attitude. In order to regain their compliance, their haughty opinion of themselves needed to be chopped way down. What’s the best option to do that to a city dweller who harbors pretensions of education and sophistication? Dispatch them to the countryside to live in abject poverty and shovel pig shit-“Rusticate them” as the CCP put it.
Many did not survive this process, euphemistically named the Up to the Mountains and Down to the Countryside Movement. However, it proved remarkably effective. Nobody ever really misbehaved again until the CIA orchestrated the Tienanmen Square Incident decades later.
What really bothers me about many of our nu-males is that they’ve come to embrace what are essentially neoliberal economic arguments that treat livable working class incomes as a problem to be rightfully solved by mass 3rd world immigration. Juan from Oaxaca is coming to make sure wages never go up a dime at the chicken processing plant, not to steal a job as a graphic designer at a marketing firm. If he loses a couple fingers and lives with a dozen other Mayans in a decrepit trailer, they could care less. And yet, they still feel good about themselves for being progressive.
These people need to be brought low. I’d call it the Put Down that IPhone and Get on Your Knees Movement. Millions would be re-tasked to perform illegal immigrant labor, under illegal immigrant conditions, for illegal immigrant compensation. They’d be dragged out of their offices and frog-marched to lettuce fields, pulled away from espresso machines and put on the line at a slaughter house and given diapers because they don’t have enough time for bathroom breaks, etc.
Their non-working hours would be filled with the acquisition of practical life skills like how to walk into a hospital and get medical treatment without paying for it, stealing an SS number, sleeping 6 to a bedroom, tossing your trash on the ground wherever you happen to be, etc. This process would go on for years, but these people deserve it. A lot of these Mexicans got put out of their traditional agricultural jobs by NAFTA. They seem like sympathetic characters by comparison.
I’m proud to officially announce my candidacy for the office of Dogcatcher.
