In the South, we love our jukeboxes for playing the music of our people, but what do we do in an age where we are assaulted by nonstop degenerate hip hop, sloppy pop, or just general sludge music? The late, great, quintessential Anglo, Roger Scruton, once called the popular music that is played in shopping malls, restaurants, and the general public as, “a music that is a background to the business of consuming things, a surrounding nothingness on which we scribble the graffiti of our desires.“
How annoying is it to go to your favorite bar and only hear “anywhere big city, USA” music blaring at you? When I’m drinking a beer and talking to my amigos, the last thing I want to hear is Lady Gaga. If I’m at a local diner, I certainly don’t want to hear the latest boy band or K-pop garbage. What’s a Southern man to do?
It turns out that there is a loophole, or an actual glitch in the matrix, that the perpetuators of this bland music have not considered. And, that is the modern jukebox. The modern jukebox is accessible to the general public. When they had the general public in mind, they forgot about you. These machines use apps that allow you to pay to play music of your choice. You might be surprised at the extensive catalogue of great Southern music. For more ideas on music, I suggest the ID series on Southern Rock and Randolph’s Jukebox. AMI Music and TouchTunes seem to be the most popular app options out there. Just start the app and you can select your location.
Let’s say you’re at your local Waffle House and you want to listen to George Strait, just fire up the app, spend $5 bucks, and you’ll have the house toe tapp’n to “Amarillo by Morning.” If you’re at the bar and you want to hear David Allen Coe? Giddy up! Be a gentleman and read the crowd, not everyone is ready for Hank Williams III. This is a true “free market” situation, so libertarians should appreciate it. You can pay $20 to stack the jukebox so as to keep the tunes you want flowing for the next 45 minutes to an hour. No more “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus!
All good things can come to an end, or at least become interrupted. Someone can spend a few more federal reserve notes and place their song to the front of the line, ergo knocking your songs down a peg or two. I’ve seen bar owners do this after I had played one too many Bocephus songs for their liking. We can’t have to much honky in our honkytonk, can we?
No one has to know that you’re playing the music. If you do it right, everyone will want to know who is playing these great songs. Again, be a gentleman. Don’t go to an urban bar and play “Carry Me Back to Virginia” by Old Crow Medicine Show. I want to encourage you to retake the places you already visit.
When they open up the bars and diners in your area, get out there and stack ’em with good Southern music. Retake the jukebox!
-By Texan
O I’m a good old rebel, now that’s just what I am. For this “fair land of freedom” I do not care at all. I’m glad I fit against it, I only wish we’d won, And I don’t want no pardon for anything I done.
Texan,
You left off Bob Wills, are you really a Texan?
My articles get edited. Once you’re down in Texas, Bob Wills is still the king….son.
Hey can we get a list of actual Southern artists? I used to like Chris Stapleton for instance, but now he supports BLM, so fuck him. We also need a running list of people who stabbed the South in the back, like Dolly Pardon, I don’t want to support musicians who are traitors. Hell we need a running list of traitors period. I would make one if someone could show me how to make money doing it. Hell I would devote the rest of my life to preserving the South if someone could show me how to make a living doing it, but anyway, lets start with some good Southern music that’s not “Old town road”.
Best actual Southern artist will always be Hank Sr. No debate. Awhile ago somebody wrote an article about Lost Dog Street Bands song Green Eyed Gal and since then I’ve been a huge fan of them (although they are now BLM people). Give them a listen if you haven’t already.