The Boat Shoe Beat: The Kobayashi Maru

There’s always fun times to be had when dealing with the abnormal elements of the Dissident Right. Of course, there’s tons of good people in the movement. Some of the finest people I’ve had the pleasure in meeting came out of this right-wing milieu. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. You’ll find those that, for whatever reason, do their damnedest to make our endeavor impossible to win.

Essentially, it’s those that hate Christ. And, I mean they really hate him. They hate Christianity too. Hell, I’d wager they hate Jesus Christ and Christianity more than the Tribe. One of their particular criticisms of our religion is that we’re no better (or different) than the Hebrews. We’re weak and need to be culled, which seems to be a rather routine recommendation from the really radical elements of the Far Right for their problems.

Now, how in the hell is that way of thinking supposed to help our people? When I say “our people,” I really mean Southerners. But, for the rest of the movement it means whoever your people are – be it, Cascadia, the Midwest or Northeast. Regardless where you’re from, I wish you well. But, our (and your) people are majority Christian. No sane person is going to read or listen to the ramblings of a sociopath spitting on their peoples’ religion (and, the religion of their forefathers and foundation of the West). That is a wholly unwinnable strategy for waking up your people.

Skin color is not a religion. Replacing Christ (or Odin, the Dragonborn, Cult of Set, General Zod, whatever, etc.) with skin color is only going to ostracize the normal and well-adjusted and invite the malcontent weirdo sphere. That’s not the type of person we want and that’s not the type of person you should want to associate with either. Want to win? Be a nationalist for your people and don’t disrespect their religion. Want to lose? Replace religion with spergy racism. Pretty simple.

This isn’t to say that Christianity isn’t without some pretty significant problems in the Current Year. We’ve published tons of critiques on the Church and her decline through modernity. Just look at the modern Episcopal Church – it’s run by weaklings that I wouldn’t let cut my grass, much less clean my boat. Anyone that would call us shills for the status quo is either a fool or a liar (maybe both).

So, what’s the Kobayashi Maru in this context? It’s when a bad faith actor presents a “would you rather” question: “Would you rather live next to a white atheist or a colored Christian?” A similar iteration is the, “Would you rather live next to a white liberal or Thomas Sowell?” Also, the question isn’t meant for you, it’s meant for the audience. It requires you to make a choice: abandon your race or abandon your religion and remember people are watching.

If you select the white atheist, you’re a hero for the White Imperium. If you select the colored Christian, you’re a race traitor and advocate for (excuse the crudeness) “Nibba Jesus Nationalism.” Regardless of your answer, there will be fallout. And, that’s the purpose. Choose your race or your soul. It’s because, in the mind of the questioner, your race outweighs your religion. It’s absurd and heretical.

When I was about ten or so, I made the mistake to question God in front of my great grandmother. It was something along the lines of the meme: why bad things happen = no God. My great grandmother leaned over and smacked me in the mouth. She lowered her brow and said to me, “Don’t you evah risk losing your soul. You only got one, dahlin’.” That’s stuck with me ever since. No meme theatrics or online trolling is worth your faith. I don’t have some mystical whiteness bond with some shitlib professor at SUNY. My bond is with Christ.

So, here’s my answer and I don’t mind saying it either. If the choice is the country black man you’ve known your whole life or some weird maladjusted post-ironic edgelord that hates Christ on the internet – I’m probably going to go fishing with Jasper Washington instead. Granted, Jasper probably can’t swim, will be drunk in an hour and mess up your jon boat. Still, a better use of my time than hanging with some guy conversing with me in a sporadic, spastic and cringy Jewish imitation accent.

Obligatorily note: neither are coming over for the family reunion or taking my kids to prom.

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