Modern Insane Asylums in Clown World Hell

One notable thing about the bizarro Clown World we all live in is that it never ceases to amaze even those of us who are its greatest skeptics and cynics. Clown World is a perfectly apt descriptive for the late, great United States because it encapsulates the salient fact that we all live and breathe and operate in a virtual and perpetual three-ring circus; a circus each of us must participate in at some level, or in some capacity or other, through no active choice of our own. Even if only as an agent for circulating federal reserve notes.

If you’re not officially or voluntarily part of the act, then you’re either unofficially part of the act, and/or, you’re an involuntary participant-observer occupying a seat in the arena enthralled by whichever act the barker and the spotlight operator have coordinated in to capture your attention.

And, then there are the sideshow acts. Wikipedia says there are four main types of classic sideshow attractions, and I am in no position to refute this assertion. Acting in capacity of the “Barker” for the particular sideshow shitshow under investigation, I now direct your attention to the first of the four listed in the wiki article apparently named the “Ten-in-One”:

The “Ten-in-One” offers a program of ten sequential acts under one tent for a single admission price. The ten-in-one might be partly a freak show exhibiting “human oddities” (including “born freaks” such as midgets, giants or persons with other deformities, or “made freaks” like tattooed people, fat people or “human skeletons”- extremely thin men often “married” to the fat lady, like Isaac W. Sprague). However, for variety’s sake, the acts in a ten-in-one would also include “working acts” who would perform magic tricks or daredevil stunts. In addition, the freak show performers might also perform acts or stunts, and would often sell souvenirs like “giant’s rings” or “pitch cards” with their photos and life stories. The ten-in-one would often end in a “blowoff” or “ding,” an extra act not advertised on the outside, which could be viewed for an additional fee. The blowoff act would be described provocatively, often as something deemed too strong for women and children, such as pickled punks.

Now, in addition to having learned with me what a “Ten-in-One” is, you’ve undoubtedly noticed, with me, that you’ve just read a pretty good description of what politics and “democratic elections” look like, feel like, and in fact are, in Clown World Hell. Narrowing the spotlight, and your focus, to the line stating that “freak show performers might also perform acts or stunts, and would often sell souvenirs like … pitch cards containing their photos and life stories,” let us attempt to define what in fact a shitshow act called a Mauree Turner is by way of observing its photo and reading the text contained on its pitch card, courtesy of they newly minted Wikipedia page:

Mauree Nivek Rajah Salima Turner is from Ardmore, Oklahoma.[2][3] They were raised in a mixed Baptist and Muslim household. Turner themself is Muslim.[1] Their family received public assistance from the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program,[4] and their father spent time in prison.[5] Turner graduated from Ardmore High School[2] and attended Oklahoma State University-Stillwater.

That a Mauree Turner insists upon they/them pronouns must derive in part from the fact that a Mauree Turner are at present identifiable by at least five unique names. That is, if I’ve counted correctly. The “plural-singular” (“themself” on the pitch card) doesn’t seem to be in the current American Clown World lexicon identifying a known grammatical construction, but look for its addition any day now since a Clown World must have a clown lexicon consistent in all its parts with its clownworldishness.

The past tense “received” on the pitch card is in all likelihood a misprint or a typo; a Mauree Turner’s “family’s” dependence on SNAP is a thing that has ever been since SNAP has been in existence, and can never go away so long as SNAP remains in existence. Especially now that a Mauree Turner themself are duly elected members of the Oklahoma Congress. (Will Representatives Mauree Nivek Rajah Salima Turner be afforded five votes for they five selfs?) 

A Mauree Turner apparently knows who they father are, although they (Mauree), and they (they mother) cannot determine for certain what year themself were spawned. This fact, of course, presents no problem nor obstacle at all in Clown World Hell. One supposes they’s (Turner’s) Oklahoma birth certificate(s) is somehow a legal document securing to theyself all privileges and immunities of a 14th Amendment Birthright citizen, notwithstanding that it cannot possibly contain a reliable birth date, apparently not an exact birth place, and certainly not a real doctor’s or witnesses signature verifying any of they’s information’s veracit-ay.

I could certainly continue on gleaning and translating information about a Mauree Turner from they Wikipedia page, but allow me to close this clownworldy article with a clownworldy prediction – that in January when the first known certifiable lunatic takes they seat(s) as the representative from Oklahoma’s 88th House district, they is going to be officially recognized by the majority of they peers in that body as a legitimate and equal member thereof. Additionally, they peers is, each and every one, going to twist theyselfs into all sorts of contorted shapes to accommodate and humor the gentle-freak/loon from district 88. But in 2020 this is the natural environment for such as a Mauree Turner; a place where they can be anything they heart desires and thrive amongst they own kind. We used to call these places insane asylums and their overseers “doctors.” In Clown World Hell, these places are called “legislatures” and “congresses,” and their overseers “speakers,” “chairmen,” and “ranking members.” That is to say when we don’t call them “governors” and “health officials.” Welcome to Clown World Hell, and say hello to one of its political “rising stars.”

Straight jackets and padded cells lie in wait for all you deplorable haters, detractors and naysayers.

3 comments

  1. Well hell… This is funny writing, but a scary political reality. Mercia has degenerated into such a state that the citizens not only allow, but encourage this clownish behavior.

  2. The thought of this, this . . . thing, being elected to anything, should send shivers down a normal person’s spine. The freak show electing it’s representatives, to the detriment of the audience.

  3. Which is why we should have always acted separately in the first place. We legitimized their laws and courts by praticapting solely in them.

    We should have had our own everything the entire time. For every fork where who we are separated from who they were forcing us to be, something other than ourselves through law, our true form could have remained intact, residing in our shadow government, which is actually the real one, but that’s clown world for you.

    Instead we are much the freak show ourselves, people whose true form has been crudely shoved into a mould by blind children with malicious intentions.

    Most of our people have no clear understanding how that came to pass, no narrative to explain it other than what is provided by those who hate us and no clear picture of what we should be or what that even looks like. We failed to provide that, its our fault.

    It is not simply enough to say clownworld is bad, that just leaves a void and people will embrace anything rather than face a void. When the Circus comes to a close, as it eventually will, and we stumble out of the tent into the world once more, we must provide them a home to go to and a map to reach it.

    Instead of wasting our time endlessly pointing out how terrible the fake State legislature, operating on fake Federal authority and funded with fake money populated by fake Southerners, our time should be spent building the real thing. Then instead of a void we can face a destination, our home.

    When the Big Tent is burning to the ground, our people will have the net we built to catch them. Believe me when I say it will have to be bigger and stronger than any trapeze act ever enjoyed. If clownworld is bad, as we all agree it is, then what does Eden look like exactly? If the freaks are not the healthy version of us, then what is? We have to provide those answers.

    Good article, sadly its all too common, so much so that the real world is becoming harder to remember everyday. We must never allow it to be forgotten, we must reclaim our home.

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