Shaving for the Future

With the passing of each year and the start of a new, we all look forward to the future and what changes it may bring. We set personal goals, be it physical, mental, or financial, and we hope to put ourselves into a better position than we were last year. As we’ve seen, however, not all change is good.

Unfortunately for us, the Weimerican ClownWorld Train has also promised to avoid stagnation and has instead put the pedal to the metal. That’s right, folks, halfway into the first month of the new year and we are already bombarded with another propaganda piece aimed at males, but this time coming way out of left field. As many of you have likely already seen, Gillette has sacrificed itself for the greater Globohomgayplex good and has taken aim at “Toxic Masculinity.” A razor company is firing off at masculinity. How rich.

Let me begin by saying that I have not used a Gillette razor in years. I am in a position where I can let my “toxic masculinity” flow freely from my face. That being said, even if I were clean shaven daily, there are much more affordable options in the razor market, with even better quality, than the ridiculous prices you pay in return for a Gillette product. All the company has really done here is chip away at their existing market to gain the approval of a much smaller group of people who will never buy their products. The soyboy, with the hideous patchy beard, that they are appealing to will clap and cheer, but will ultimately never be a customer. Congratulations, you’ve failed Marketing 101. Or, were they trying to appeal to the militant feminist who proudly displays unkempt sections of body hair at rallies, while screaming at the few chivalrous gentlemen still left in this God forsaken country? I can’t tell anymore.

With all of that in mind, it’s still quite comical to me that a razor company has taken this position. Hell, we have a whole nation of people who can’t figure out whether to give their daughters a doll or testosterone treatments. We live in a society that can’t decide whether to teach a boy to shave at 13 or chop his genitals off. So how long until this subversive, but foolish, advertisement backfires? How can they target masculinity, toxic or otherwise, in a country with a double-digit number of genders?

If our country truly cared about instilling manners and higher virtue in men, the attacks on the traditional family and its values would cease. We would see a return to traditional lifestyles, instead of leaving our children to learn the most important aspects of life from predatory media outlets. Every home would have a mother and a father raising their children without the influence of the worst parts of capitalism and the fabricated morals these hawks attempt to instill. Fathers would ensure that their boys could not only maintain a household, but also compose himself in a respectful and powerful manner that is worthy of the love of an honorable woman.

Instead, we are granted advertisements that lecture their viewership about the poisonous male, in between segments of ridiculous levels of glamorized degeneracy and subtle pedophilia. All on display for our children to see. It’s laughable at best and a sucker punch to the jaw at worst.

Thank you, Weimerica.

6 comments

  1. I just watched the ad. I don’t even think Gillette cares about selling razors. Pankaj Bhalla, brand manager for north America, says they aren’t pulling the ad, “We recognize it’s sparking a lot of passionate dialogue — at the same time, it’s getting people to stop and think about what it means to be our best selves, which is the point of the spot”. The point wasn’t to sell product, it was to criticize society.

    If I shaved, I’d check out Bawdy Barber based on their Twitter response.

    1. Just the fact that the NORTH AMERICAN marketing department for Gillette is run by a dude named “Pankaj Bhalla” should be a slap in the face to normal working class Americans, it’s not your country anymore and YOU ARE PLEBS and WAGE SLAVES to be whipped, berrated, and shamed into submission.

      1. Pepsi has an Indian CEO. A fact that was pointed out to me during Trump’s campaign by an angry boomer. He felt it was a slap in the face, but more because she said some anti-Trump things in the news.

    2. They are not in a position to criticize society. They sell razors and shaving accessories. They need to stay in their lane and leave the politics to people and political organizations, not companies.

  2. 1-800-445-5388

    Gillette customer service.

    I suggest calling each and every day and let them know that you will continue to call to file complaints until they pull the ad and issue an apology to men.

    Their normie customer base who is oblivious needs to be inconvenienced by long hold items waiting to talk to someone. They need to be forced to hire temps to answer the phone.