I got to make a trip back into occupied territory this weekend for my great grandmother’s ninetieth birthday. I saw my two nieces and loads of family and while that was an amazing trip, I have something to tell you. Interstates are fucking terrible and are a cancer.
Yes, they do carry goods efficiently from place to place but, that being said, they act as blinders to our fate should we lose in our endeavors. I drove four hours on just normal highways and byways passing through towns that probably, twenty years ago, were still alive but, passing through them now, I see that they are dying or already dead.
Rows of buildings laying vacant and destitute. Boarded up windows. Houses that once were surrounded with well manicured lawns and little white kids playing with the family dog laying in ruin and disrepair, or vacated by the previous tenants for greener pastures and whiter towns. Trucks sitting in the back of some old long forgotten pasture, just rusting away like the dreams of the boy who bought it when the world was new and he had nothing but the future ahead of him.
I got onto the interstate to go back into occupied territory, the alien world where I am from but is now more foreign to me than a long lost relative with Alzheimer’s forgetting my name. The interstate is so disgusting and sterile. No architecture other than a billboard for Sneaky Pete’s Adult Emporium XXX adult shop. Ten miles further on Exit 43 and the scattered McDonald’s hawking the latest soy burger conglomeration. Passing semis and car loads of people looking for their destination and navigating through the gauntlet of speedtraps and road construction – mind you, on roads that are far below what one would expect from a state that is supposed to be functional and not teetering on the brink of absolute collapse.
Soon, dear readers, Small Town America, USA will die, if we do not stop patronizing the Eisenhower interstate system. Until next time brothers, call your parents, go to church, make your bed and mow your lawn, but most of all, get off the damn highway.