There is this myth floating about propagated by certain women and their lapdogs that the primary reason that males experience suffering is that they bottle things up and are reticent to talk about their feelings and are either unwilling or unable to communicate their deeper needs and emotions. Leading to the proposed solution that men need to learn to open up more and share their pains in order to return to health.
As much as I appreciate the gesture I ‘feel’ that it is way off the mark. Once again, the blame for all problems is shifted back onto men.
So, now the cause is transferred and it’s not that men are suffering because they are unappreciated or vilified…
or exist in a society that has no regard for them…
or that they are exposed to over 80% of media-output that is hostile to them…
or that their entire experience of education as children is to a system that is inimical to their preferences and predilections…
or that they can never expect to be thanked or experience gratitude from the women they sacrifice their well-being and lives for…
No, it is because they can’t express themselves! Like, seriously???
And then I also disagree with the notion that men are deficit in expressing themselves. Men actually express themselves perfectly well…just not in the ways in which women do. And herein lies the problem. What women want is for men to communicate like they do, and when men do it in other ways most women simply can’t even register that communication is occurring.
Because they refuse to listen to men!
Take me for example. I am perfectly articulate and have an excellent conduit between my emotions and my verbosity. And I express my emotions constantly. I express my bitterness that suicide rates for young males are brushed under the carpet in lieu of further exposes on the plight of women. I express the rage I feel that Feminist-fundamentalists have re-engineered all of society to reflect a man-hating agenda. I express my dissatisfaction with the fact that many women simply swallow hook, line, and sinker the brainwashing they’ve received at the hands of these Feminists. I express my ire at being blocked from voicing my insights and intellectual-agility in a paradigm that rewards mediocrity more than it does genius. I express the frustration I feel from constantly having to reiterate the same arguments over and over to the willfully ignorant when in other countries both men and women seem to be able to instantly grasp them. And, I express my sheer surprise and shock that one-half of the population here can’t seem to accept any accountability or responsibility for any of the world’s problems – choosing instead to conveniently scapegoat men and resort to some paranoid-delusion about a male-led conspiracy to oppress women collectively since the dawn of humanity!
I have been expressing all of these ‘feelings’ and ’emotions’ really, really well. But whenever I do, very few women seem to appreciate my communication of feeling.
So, no, the problems that men experience have little to do with a supposed inability to voice their hurts – they result from the fact that the gender they are expressing these hurts to refuses to listen.
I personally am offended by the attempt to reduce the plight of boys and young men to an inability on their part to express their feelings. This easy description of deep-seated issues is as simplistic an explanation as dismissing the problems that girls and young women experience to challenges in reading maps, playing chess, or peeing in an arc.
Generally speaking, boys will never be as articulate in expressing their feelings as girls simply because they are males. They are not hardwired to possess this as a forte in the same way as their female counterparts.
Admittedly, it may be possible to engineer a generation of boys who will have a similar facility if we hack off their testes at birth and then dose them up on estrogen and other female hormones for the rest of their lives.
In effect, if we turn them into girls! And this betrays the intention behind the reiteration of this lie.
See, the truer reasons that boys and young men suffer so is that they are denied access to a healthy-identity.
Males require certain conditions in order to access their deeper masculinity: such as identification with fathers and father figures who are esteemed by a culture; positive messages in society about men’s distinctive contributions; rites-of-passage administered by elder males which take them away from the world of women and initiate them into a male-only realm; and an educational environment that allows them freedom to vent their more-dynamic energies and to move more freely.
We provide our boys none of these. So, they suffer unnecessarily.
We then ignore all of these conditions and deflect away from actual causes to posit a solution along the lines of talk-therapy. Furthermore, we present an impossible ideal to our boys: “Only once you can talk about your feelings like us girls do, will you be free of problems.”
Impossible ideals serve the function of promoting perpetual deniability.
And this is why Feminists resort to this cliche to explain away the sufferings of our males: in order to justify further re-engineering of society to cater exclusively to females.
But, if men are suffering because they are denied access to a healthy male-identity then further depriving them of this is hardly going to relieve their suffering. Makes sense, right?
Men are now dogs in our society, and if somebody gets off on mistreating a dog it matters little to its plight whether it whines or yelps or barks. Expressing its ‘feelings’ is not going to save it – unless somebody actually begins to care for it.
-By Kaine JC