In the conversation about miscegenation, there have been a lot of arguments about racial differences, IQ standards, and a great deal more about the dangers posed to individual women who choose to marry or bed down with black men. There’s a lot of criticism for men who are attracted to women of other races too; most often, it’s Whites who are attracted to Asians or Latinos. There’s one thing that no one seems to mention, though, and it’s troubling because of how important it is to our survival: children. In most cases, perhaps it goes unsaid; the children who result from these pairings are always in the background of the criticism levelled at the parents—usually the mothers. Little thought, and no sympathy, is ever extended to them.
I see the slogan “resistance is fertile” often—the recent reports of reproductive habits in Africa compared with the United States and other Western countries only undergird the reality that our children are the future—our future. When I was little, I was told (I forget by whom) that children are a mother’s first gift to her grandchildren. All of us are a bridge between one generation and the next, and we’re defined by that. Our sense of belonging is our identity. Children who lack a sense of belonging, who are forced to forge their own identity because they don’t have a natural one, struggle with themselves all through their lives. They turn to self-destruction in various forms, by painting themselves with some shade of the LGBTQ rainbow, turning to drugs and alcohol abuse, joining gangs, or some other form of violence to themselves or others. They do this because they want to belong and fit in, and their family can’t supply them with that.
In most cases, kids who don’t belong come from broken families, where there’s been a divorce (or no marriage at all), or where abuse defines their parents’ relationship, or where drug addiction has robbed them of one or both of their parents and they are fed into the foster system. Kids of mixed-race families, though, also have this burden to carry. It’s not because statistically race-mixing with Blacks especially create some or all of the above conditions, or because they end up in single-parent settings which account for upwards of ¾ of all criminals in the United States. It’s because by virtue of being mixed-race, they are deprived from an early age of a sense of belonging because they are torn between two identities.
I’ve worked in a variety of very diverse situations, both urban and rural, higher and lower on the income scale, both skilled and unskilled work. I think most people in my generation have. I’ve noticed, especially in the cities I’ve worked in, that there’s a large number of people of mixed-race heritage, and in every case I’ve encountered, I’ve seen the same traits come up again and again. I understand, of course, that anecdotal evidence isn’t the best basis for an argument, because my experience is limited to where I’ve worked and who I’ve worked with, but it should at least give us pause that these cases exist with such frequency that I’ve yet to encounter variation to the theme.
I’m going to restrict myself to black-white mixes because that’s what I’ve encountered. I worked with two girls at different places (both white-collar), who I’m going to call Sally and Renee. Sally was African, whose father had married a fair-skinned Caribbean woman who would more or less pass as White-Hispanic on the US census. Her family was strong, her father was very wealthy (he worked for the government), and she had close ties with both her Caribbean and her African family – she herself had a good job and was getting a promotion as I was leaving that employer. Sally’s problem, though, was that she was much closer to her African family than her Caribbean, but she looked much more like her Caribbean family. This made her feel excluded from both, despite the fact that both were very accepting of her, and had no problem with her parents’ marriage. Her siblings had similar problems: some going in the opposite direction. They couldn’t find a place, because their heart could be in one place, but their personalities or their appearance would be in another, or they’d feel like they were betraying one or another side.
Renee’s situation was different, and hard to say whether she was better or worse off. She was the result of a white American mother and Afro-American father, who had remained married and she was still in contact with most of her family. She was, however, engaged in a sort of constant, low-level feud with her two sisters, both of whom got on better with her White family and self-identified as White/mixed. She was always closer to her father and identified strongly as Black/unmixed. The result was that she was off on her own, and found her identity and belonging mostly from the local black community, and barely spoke to her siblings or her mother’s family. Her siblings had a similar, but less hostile, relationship with her father’s family.
Her siblings, though, would never really be accepted by her father’s family just as she was never really comfortable around her mother’s family. Other stories play out in a similar vein: choose one or the other. Even my own family, which is half British and half German, has issues of identity, but those issues are far more easily overcome because of the deep similarity between our more ancient ancestors. That kind of commonality just doesn’t exist between different races, and the end result is confusion for children that have no real resolution except alienation from one or another side of the family.
That’s why, ultimately, race-mixing is unhealthy: it’s not about Whites mixing with other races, ultimately: it’s about any race mixing with any other. The result will always be a family that is, to a greater or lesser degree, broken, and children that are, to a greater or lesser degree, confused and alienated from their family. When you have children, your children are the most important thing in your life, and they should be. If you really care more about your future kids than about yourself and your own ideological hang-ups, does it make sense to race-mix?